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A Tea House Ministry in Chicago
Pastor Jiang, one of the pastors of the New Life Community Church network in Chicago, is from Qingdao, China but he has been influenced by the culture of Taiwan. Taiwanese people enjoy sitting around with a tea set and talking over a cup of fresh tea. In Taiwan it would be very impolite to have […]
Bearing With: Recognizing and Accepting Differences
[…] of what he said. I just know that, as he talked, I was looking for the time when I could say, ‘I’m sorry’ to him.” When a phone call interrupted his monologue, she seized the opportunity and apologized. He accepted her apology, and their relationship was restored. By God’s design, we are different from […]
Barriers to Apologizing, Part 1
[…] inbox as soon as it’s published. Li Qiang (pseudonym), author interview, 2019. <em>Confucian relationalism</em>, a term used by Kwang-Kuo Hwang, is the technical term that defines a number of social relationships in China. Confucian values and their accompanying ethical system dictate the intimacy or distance of a relationship as well as the superior or […]
An Elephant in the Room: Face
[…] having value to others and their community. Behaviors related to conflict and reconciliation that in a Chinese context are culturally understood to cause loss of face include 1) someone critiquing or pointing out another person’s fault or mistake in the presence of a third party, and 2) personally acknowledging a mistake or being wrong. […]
The Benefits of Giving Face
[…] genuinely loves, values, and forgives us, and he addresses the issues, pointing out specific areas such as fear and calling us to acknowledge our sin (Psalm 32: 1–11, John 8:10–12, Matthew 10:31, and Psalm 103:8–14). God purposefully addresses issues with us so we can be transformed (Romans 12:2 and 2 Corinthians 3:18). Note: This […]
Reconciling a Church Split
[…] an elder of a local church in China had not spoken to each other for four months. My heart ached when I heard this news. In John 13:34–35 Jesus said to his followers, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are […]
Opening the Door to Reconciliation
Those I interviewed in China… expressed repeatedly that holding tight to these unexamined views of themselves and their positions was a big hindrance in reconciling relationships. Yet, as their mindsets shifted, a door to potential reconciliation opened.
When a Gift Is Not Enough
[…] This specific list was pulled from <em>RW360</em>, “Seven A’s of a Biblical Confession—Get the Log Out of Your Eye,” accessed December 17, 2021, <a href="https://rw360.org/seven-as-of-a-biblical-confession/">https://rw360.org/seven-as-of-a-biblical-confession/</a>.</p><ol class="wp-block-list" type=" 1"><li><strong>A</strong>ddress everyone involved (all those whom you affected)</li> <li><strong>A</strong>void if, but, and maybe (do not try to excuse your wrongs)</li> <li><strong>A</strong>dmit specifically (both attitudes and actions)</li> <li><strong>A</strong>cknowledge […]
Prayer First
[…] Note: Watch for Jolene’s forthcoming book, Changing Normal: Break Through Barriers to Pursuing Peace in Your Relationships, for more examples of how prayer can impact movement from being in conflict to experiencing restoration in a relationship. Available on Amazon starting January 14, 2024. Li Jun (pseudonym), author interview, 2019. Zhou Na (pseudonym), author interview, 2019.
Heart vs Surface-level Reconciliation
[…] be published book: Changing Normal: A New Approach to Conflict, Face Issues, and Reconciling Relationships. John W. de Gruchy, <em>Reconciliation: Restoring Justice</em> (Minneapolis: Fortress Press, 2002), Kindle, chapter 1, section 2. Zhang Jing (pseudonym), author interview. Surface-level reconciliation in Chinese: 表é¢ä¸ÂçÂÂåÂÂ好 (<em>biaomian shang de hehao)</em>. Li-Li Huang, “Interpersonal Harmony and Conflict for Chinese People: A […]